I meant to schedule a post for today, but Roan surprised me last Friday by taking a day off from work, so my initial plans of doing blog work was deliberately pushed aside. I’m not complaining, though, because we had an interesting weekend! It’s so much so that I thought I’d write something a tad bit personal than I usually share here on the blog. After all, I promised to add a little spice to this humble space of mine. Posts about our random weekend travels can wait…
No, it’s not yet our wedding anniversary, but Roan and I have been married for one year, eight months, and three days today. Twenty months in. That seems like a while to many, but sometimes, it feels as if we’ve only tied the knot yesterday. We’ve been living together for only three months, though, so we’re like pseudo-newlyweds.
To be quite honest, moving in with my husband for the first time was nerve-wracking. I mean, it’s one thing that we’ve known each other for more than a decade, but it’s another to wake up next to each other every single day. If you thought marriage is all rainbows and butterflies, then think again. I tell you this: at one point in your life, you’ll tell yourself, “What did I get myself into?”
We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly. —Sam Keen
Rather than taking tabs on the instances Roan failed to put his socks in the laundry basket upon coming home from work, I’d pick them up, and toss them to where they belong. I only needed to remind him once. Whenever he forgets, I’d call his attention, but it’s supposed to be in a way that’s not faultfinding. Words hurt more than a dagger does, so it’s important to speak them sans the judgmental tone.
The things I’m more likely to stress about are those that has something to do with me. I always need to remind myself that the stuff I carried with me from my childhood may not be the same as his. We certainly have our “moments”, but those matters are meant to be discussed and resolved in private. What’s the point in bringing all your frustrations to social media, anyway?
Today, I am grateful for all these differences. A life without them is boring. These are what makes life colorful and interesting. I’d be worried if my marriage life were spotless because that’s not how it works. In this seemingly perfect life we’re living, we’re imperfect. Marriage is a lifetime commitment, and we remain to be a work-in-progress.